stands up

so this cute sexy big-dicked guy puts
on his underpants and then he gets a notion
to stuff some big peeled
carrots down those tight white underpants
while he is wearing the underpants.
then he takes about 50 photographs
of himself this way, with those
big peeled carrots
stuffed into his briefs,
and then, when that
does not seem immediate
enough, he calls up michael,
a friend of his who's
an art museum director,
and he tells michael
to rush right
on over. so michael the art museum
director
rushes on over,
and the carrots-in-underpants
guy meets michael at the door,
and michael
is a bit shocked, and
charmed, too.  so it turns
out the carrots-in-underpants
guy is an installation
in michael's next
art museum exhibit.
the carrots-in-underpants guy
stands there
6 hours a day with
18 or so big peeled carrots
stuck down
his tight white underpants.
attendance is good.
museum visitors are
intrigued.
carrots-in-underpants
guy and michael
are
secretly in love, by the way.
ah, the sweet subtle vaguaries of
art.

--Carl Miller Daniels (This poem appeared in FUCK!, Volume 13, No 9, September 2010.)